Old Time Medley

Old Time medley – [mainly war-time tunes]

[Tune: Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag – F Powell]
Leave all your tension in your old golf bag and swing, swing, swing.
You won’t have any need to light that fag if you hum a tune or sing:
What’s the use of worrying ’bout where your ball will go – so –
Leave all your tension in your old golf bag and swing, swing, swing.
——
[Tune: It’s a long way to Tipperary – J Judge]
It’s a long way down the eighth hole, there’s a long way to go,
When you can’t reach the bunker with your Sunday best, nor the ditch with your next blow.
Though you’re on the fairway, and half way there in four,
If you keep on a-blasting at that poor ol’ ball, you’ll run up some score….
——
[Tune: Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag – F Powell]
Put back your putter in your ol’ golf bag
And smile, smile, smile.
I heard you mutter, “It was just a lag”,
But your putt missed by a mile.
There’s no use in mutterin’
Nor using language vile!
So — put back your putter in your ol’ golf bag
And smile, smile, smile!
——
[Tune: Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler – D Taverner]
Who do you think you are kidding Mr Golfer when you hand your scorecard in?
Often as not you don’t even print your name,
And then we find that you’ve quite mistook the game.
Who do you think you are kidding Mr Golfer when we come to check your score?
Your handicap may kid you that you’ve made a decent show,
But the truth, if you can face it, may still come as quite a blow…
You watch out Mr Golfer you can’t hope that we can guess
What total you have really scored from this unholy mess…
So – Who do you think you are kidding Mr Golfer when you hand your scorecard in?

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